I'm a week pregnant today. Thats guessing the exact day that i became pregnant but i know i am, day 37 since the last you know. Doctors next week.
My boyfriend and i havent really come to a decision. I don't want it. He does.
Well, I suppose thats a lie. If he would commit, if he would show some effort, i could do it. But from where i stand right now, he's not mature enough to handle a baby. And me, well.. I just wanna live a couple more years dangerously, so to speak. I want to go to university and that's why i've been beating my brains out trying so hard in school. I couldnt stop crying at this thought: I have worked hard my entire life so I could become something great. I always wanted to change the world. Not really possible, but it's something worth working for. Now i can't. It's over. This situation will change me with whatever i choose to do.
My first grade twelve exam is tomorrow. Going in with a 91. Will see what i come out with.
That's all I really have to say.
Until tomorrow.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Entry Twenty-Three Jan 15/09
Wow it's been a long time. I deleted this site a long time ago or at least i thought i did because it scared me, how i had exposed myself so much. I stumbled back onto it today, and thought, why not update it, just for spite.
I kind of lost my writers 'nack', but im gunna try and get back into it. This entry will only be to get everyone back up to speed since it's been a year since i last wrote basically.
I've been dating this guy for almost eleven months now and i love him with all my heart. I was reading my old blogs and couldn't believe how i used to be, and how i used to never believe in love. This is the only thing i can say about that: Believe in love, it's totally real. It's messy, and sometimes it hurts, but it is so worth it.
He bought me a hamster his name is elvis and i dont think ive ever had such a strong love for a pet. Lmao? question mark intended. We disagreed for a while on whether or not to go into the new year with a baby, but decided against it cuz im going to university next year.
Ive been accepted to lakehead so far, and also applied to mac, laurier and trent. i have a 93, 91 and 90 in french, chem and math.. im pretty happy about it and will boast.. tho i wish they were better. School is hard. Enough said.
My parents are both set on me going to lakehead, i don't wanna go. A) i hate the winter. B) its far away from everything i have ever loved and will love. If you haven't gathered from this already, i am a homebody , and i like my home.
Until next time. Hopefully without the long delay.
Happy 2009 readers!
I kind of lost my writers 'nack', but im gunna try and get back into it. This entry will only be to get everyone back up to speed since it's been a year since i last wrote basically.
I've been dating this guy for almost eleven months now and i love him with all my heart. I was reading my old blogs and couldn't believe how i used to be, and how i used to never believe in love. This is the only thing i can say about that: Believe in love, it's totally real. It's messy, and sometimes it hurts, but it is so worth it.
He bought me a hamster his name is elvis and i dont think ive ever had such a strong love for a pet. Lmao? question mark intended. We disagreed for a while on whether or not to go into the new year with a baby, but decided against it cuz im going to university next year.
Ive been accepted to lakehead so far, and also applied to mac, laurier and trent. i have a 93, 91 and 90 in french, chem and math.. im pretty happy about it and will boast.. tho i wish they were better. School is hard. Enough said.
My parents are both set on me going to lakehead, i don't wanna go. A) i hate the winter. B) its far away from everything i have ever loved and will love. If you haven't gathered from this already, i am a homebody , and i like my home.
Until next time. Hopefully without the long delay.
Happy 2009 readers!
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